Last night was one of those magical nights. Magical for me of late has meant organic and by that I mean time just unfolds; days and nights develop without much guidance or push into something delicious.
I love days and nights that unfold like this. Wonderful unplanned visits with friends stopping by or walks or bike rides with my girl or wagon rides around the neighborhood where we meet new neighbors and have conversation while our kids play. Yes these are the kind of days and nights I love. Organic. When my workday for now is routine, I like some of the other parts of my time to be a little less routine. There are plans of course to eat and grocery shop and pay bills and work on the ever-growing list of the to-dos but there is a fine balance for me on certain days where there are no hugely concrete plans just perhaps a few parameters that set the pace of the day like oh they are coming by at 2 or yeah let's eat meet at 6.
This night was one of those great nights where the pace of the night just felt right. This is the organic I am talking about. Nothing was definitively planned. I came home to meet my sweet sister-friend and her girl. Next, the rest of my family came home from their day. We poured some wine and talked and caught up on weeks of stories. Our girls put on their princess dresses, ate ravioli and played. We talk in tangents always connecting the dots in conversation and for both of us it really never matters if we finish one topic or not because we know we'll pick it up the next time we talk.
In our town, Wednesday night is Hoola Hoop night at one of our favorite local hangouts. The DJ is one of my favorites and on Wednesdays he spins some good old style reggae among other stuff. What is old style Reggae? I don't know but I know its what I like and I can tell you some of these songs I've been listening to for over 20 years. That is alot of time and yet it feels like it isn't. I love reggae particularly in the spring and summer and in the sunshine. This is music that makes me want to dance. Desmond Dekker and the Israelites, so many others. I labored to this music when I had my sweet baby girl. Great labor music. Great hooping music. An invitation to get lost in the groove. I close my eyes and let myself go who cares if the hoop drops keep going on.
The great part of this hoopin night is anyone can go. All ages. There are wee ones hooping right along side grandmothers. I watch my girl as she spins her hoop. She has without a doubt in this moment found her own groove as she dances and spins her sweet self freely around and around. I soak up the music, my girl and my friends and family and I taste the goodness of this moment.
The night of music continues to unfold as one of my favorite bands begins to play Yogoman Burning Band. I don't know the people in the band but to me it sure seems this band loves what they are doing. Their energy, the energy they give to the crowd is pure magic. They are plain and simple: so fun and so good. How good it is to be around fun this energy, to be around people who love what they are doing.
As my sister-friend and I dance together, with our children, on our own we watch our girls, the two of them smiling and dancing, running and venturing on their own. We watch them shine. We say to eachother "look at our girls." We don't need to say much more.
I love this night. I am filled with energy when we get back home and after putting my girl to bed though it is nearly 11:00 I am not ready to sleep.
There's much I have to do this week. Yes plans. But good ones and there is no specific date and time just action steps to accomplish within the week. I realized yesterday more urgently than perhaps on other days that I needed a bulletin board to post my plans, to-dos and post them big. I want my ideas and dreams up on my wall where I can stand before them, look at them, work on them, do them. My pocket size calendar and small moleskin notebook are great for my bag a and keeping track of appointments and in the moment brainstorms but for the dreams I am working on now I know they must be posted in a much bigger space. I never would have thought it would have taken months to decide on the type of bulletin board I wanted but it did. I thought I found the perfect giant sized one a few weeks ago in a free curb-side giveaway. A few days later when I really took a good look at the big board now inside our house, I saw that it was was warped. And warped for my dream board just didn't feel right. So I made the purchase yesterday and settled on corkboard tiles that I can put right up on my wall without a hammer and nail. I am excited. I have some initial postings for my wall that I am getting ready to work on too. More on this soon.
Thursday, August 30, 2007
Saturday, August 25, 2007
Adventures of the Sparkly Bandaid
Well this last friday night was quite a night.
I came home from work beat from a week of work, late nights visiting with friends and family. On this very night after a very minimal amount of weeding, hoopin girl and I went in to forage for some easy friday night dinner fixins.
Like many four-year olds, my girl is packed with energy, boundless it seems sometimes. "Mom," she asked, "can I do some rolls on the couch?" One of her favorite indoor activities is doing forward rolls on the comfy, cushy living room couch. As a mom, I know this is probably not the best choice for me to make, that is let her allow her to use the couch as a gymnastics mat, balance beam or vault. There is another voice though that says ah let her try, there are pillows, the space is safe and she'll be alright. And besides I continue to say to myself, don't be too overprotective of her physical pursuits. She is feeling strong and confident. I know it must sound crazy--like what on earth am I doing letting her stand on the couch and roll across the pillows but there I was once again letting it happen trusting all would be fine. All was going well, until her next trick. As fast as I could say "no hopping on one foot on the edge of the couch" she slipped from the hop, rolled off the couch and into corner edge of our wooden coffee table. Watching her fall felt like slow motion but I don't think I've ever moved faster scooping her up. No doubt about it, this was a scary fall. I moved fast, holding her so tight racing to the kitchen to clean her up, holding a compress to the wound. I was scared for my girl knowing she was scared and I was scared for me as her mom. I felt such vulnerability, wanting so badly to fix everything right then and there and knowing it wasn't going to be that easy. I had to grab hold of myself, the scared self and tell that self to be calm, be calm for my girl. Honestly that took a minute or two or three. I called her dad well rather yelled loudly for her dad to come in the house quick. I was feeling better by the minute, calmer. We knew this was not an ordinary cut and that yeah we better get to the doctor fast.
We raced to the car and headed to the doctor--so fortunate that our pediatrician's office can take care of coffee table accidents such as this one. We told our girl of a couple of our adventures as kids--my ricochet into the neighbors clothes line that sent me in for 2 stitches and her dad's fall on his chin that got him a stitch or two.
Maybe our wonderful doctor was trying to make me feel better telling me that her own 3 kids climb and jump and roll of their couch all the time and that in fact they'd had several coffee table incidents that very day--whatever it was fact or fiction it worked.
Our girl was brave. Four stitches, three stories and even a couple of songs later, we were all feeling much better. The best part in her opinion of this latest adventure is the sparkly silver and oh so shiny bandaid that adorns her forehead. She was back to herself in full swing the next day, spinning and dancing with her hoop, ready to climb again. We will take a break from the tumbling until she is fully healed and well the green couch will remain just that our comfy couch better for ready and cuddling retired now from indoor gymnastics.
I know I feel so completely grateful that she is back to her sparkly, shiny energetic and sassy self four stitches and all.
I came home from work beat from a week of work, late nights visiting with friends and family. On this very night after a very minimal amount of weeding, hoopin girl and I went in to forage for some easy friday night dinner fixins.
Like many four-year olds, my girl is packed with energy, boundless it seems sometimes. "Mom," she asked, "can I do some rolls on the couch?" One of her favorite indoor activities is doing forward rolls on the comfy, cushy living room couch. As a mom, I know this is probably not the best choice for me to make, that is let her allow her to use the couch as a gymnastics mat, balance beam or vault. There is another voice though that says ah let her try, there are pillows, the space is safe and she'll be alright. And besides I continue to say to myself, don't be too overprotective of her physical pursuits. She is feeling strong and confident. I know it must sound crazy--like what on earth am I doing letting her stand on the couch and roll across the pillows but there I was once again letting it happen trusting all would be fine. All was going well, until her next trick. As fast as I could say "no hopping on one foot on the edge of the couch" she slipped from the hop, rolled off the couch and into corner edge of our wooden coffee table. Watching her fall felt like slow motion but I don't think I've ever moved faster scooping her up. No doubt about it, this was a scary fall. I moved fast, holding her so tight racing to the kitchen to clean her up, holding a compress to the wound. I was scared for my girl knowing she was scared and I was scared for me as her mom. I felt such vulnerability, wanting so badly to fix everything right then and there and knowing it wasn't going to be that easy. I had to grab hold of myself, the scared self and tell that self to be calm, be calm for my girl. Honestly that took a minute or two or three. I called her dad well rather yelled loudly for her dad to come in the house quick. I was feeling better by the minute, calmer. We knew this was not an ordinary cut and that yeah we better get to the doctor fast.
We raced to the car and headed to the doctor--so fortunate that our pediatrician's office can take care of coffee table accidents such as this one. We told our girl of a couple of our adventures as kids--my ricochet into the neighbors clothes line that sent me in for 2 stitches and her dad's fall on his chin that got him a stitch or two.
Maybe our wonderful doctor was trying to make me feel better telling me that her own 3 kids climb and jump and roll of their couch all the time and that in fact they'd had several coffee table incidents that very day--whatever it was fact or fiction it worked.
Our girl was brave. Four stitches, three stories and even a couple of songs later, we were all feeling much better. The best part in her opinion of this latest adventure is the sparkly silver and oh so shiny bandaid that adorns her forehead. She was back to herself in full swing the next day, spinning and dancing with her hoop, ready to climb again. We will take a break from the tumbling until she is fully healed and well the green couch will remain just that our comfy couch better for ready and cuddling retired now from indoor gymnastics.
I know I feel so completely grateful that she is back to her sparkly, shiny energetic and sassy self four stitches and all.
Thursday, August 23, 2007
about that boulder...
Tonight marked a great evening albeit a little bittersweet as we celebrated the adventures of two friends moving back to the midwest. I look at these friends and feel a full heart as they met in eachother a great match. The image of the two of them and their dogs setting course across the states makes me smile and well even inspires a little kick in my butt to think about some new adventures of my own. I am a road trip fiend though I've not been on a big one in a couple of years. I am a wanderluster. I can end up in many a town and dream about what it would like to live there. With a snap almost, I can see quitting my job, packing up and heading on. And its not that I don't like where I live or love my friends nearby, its just the dream and thrill of setting course to do something new is completely captivating. This topic I can surely revisit. There are many stories to tell about the road or desire to hit the road local and beyond.
So back to the dinner... We were sitting around my living room tonight after a few glasses of red wine and a good summer meal talking about everything from the company where we all have worked and on the adventures that lie ahead. We talked a bit about the river I've been writing about and more about that boulder. My pal said "oh i was hoping you were going to write about going around the boulder" Well timing is everything. I was thinking today and actually was reminded as I read this great piece I'll share soon called "Advice from the River" that really the river does just keeps flowing around the boulder, there is no fight that I can imagine. There is no resistance. The river just keeps flowing.
Travelling on can be a beautiful thing. Going with the flow, the path of least resistance where things just feel right.
So back to the dinner... We were sitting around my living room tonight after a few glasses of red wine and a good summer meal talking about everything from the company where we all have worked and on the adventures that lie ahead. We talked a bit about the river I've been writing about and more about that boulder. My pal said "oh i was hoping you were going to write about going around the boulder" Well timing is everything. I was thinking today and actually was reminded as I read this great piece I'll share soon called "Advice from the River" that really the river does just keeps flowing around the boulder, there is no fight that I can imagine. There is no resistance. The river just keeps flowing.
Travelling on can be a beautiful thing. Going with the flow, the path of least resistance where things just feel right.
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
On Letting Go
So I've been thinking again about this whole concept of letting go. I always like to think about life as a river, hopefully flowing freely with the current. Sometimes it happens that I let myself stop flowing, caught up against a big ol' boulder in the river. The more I fight the flow forward the more of course I go nowhere. Trying hard to figure out what to do about the boulder, how to work with it, how to make it move. Its exhausting. I spend more and more energy spinning around and around. But alas, I am slowly ever slowly and gradually learning to relax and breathe, come up for air. I don't have to do anything but relax and breathe, be true to my own flow. I remind myself how important it is to ride, let go and flow onward. Go with the flow takes on a whole new meaning. When I relax I am myself. I find my own groove.
And on finding my groove, I have been hooping quite a bit the past two evenings with my girl. I close my eyes and feel myself fill with joy, grinning ear to ear. We listen to music and hoop, spin and dance.
And on finding my groove, I have been hooping quite a bit the past two evenings with my girl. I close my eyes and feel myself fill with joy, grinning ear to ear. We listen to music and hoop, spin and dance.
Sunday, August 19, 2007
Circle Round
I intended to start writing a few days ago and here I am a few days later. I feel like I'm standing on the edge of a river, a beautiful, fast and flowing river, cold and so incredibly fresh. Though knowing the jump into the cold burst will be exhilerating, I find it still just a little scary starting this journey of a blog. I've been talking about it long enough and I know I am ready and excited for where this journey of writing will take me.
The start. I came up with a couple of different names but have settled on HoopinMama. I have a delicious four-year old girl who loves to Hoola Hoop and through watching her find her way with the Hoop, and witnessing the thrill she has in just moving with it, I too have become a huge fan of the Hoop. For years, I was resistant to even pick one up because I thought I couldn't do it.
With the hoop, the magic was in finding the right hoop. And the answer to that was start big. I learned to start with a nice big heavy hoop. I also watched many a hooper and noticed the ones keeping it up were barely moving, just effortless in the circle round. I was thinking about not thinking as I could feel my body find its own rhythm and groove. On a fabulous tip and from watching my girl, I started by just rockin it slowly back and forth. Pretty soon, there i was ever so subtly finding my own groove, rockin it there with my girl.
Then I thought some more about not thinking so hard about how helpful it can be to just let go sometimes and see what happens with that.
So this blog I suppose begins a journey of some exploration. There are some big dreams I am working on and this for me is just a place to write a little bit about daily life and the pursuit of some of these dreams.
Today has been one of those hugely emotional days celebrating the marriage of an old friend and saying goodbye again to one of my very best friends and her children as they head back to their home far away from the Northwest. So for now this is my start.
The start. I came up with a couple of different names but have settled on HoopinMama. I have a delicious four-year old girl who loves to Hoola Hoop and through watching her find her way with the Hoop, and witnessing the thrill she has in just moving with it, I too have become a huge fan of the Hoop. For years, I was resistant to even pick one up because I thought I couldn't do it.
With the hoop, the magic was in finding the right hoop. And the answer to that was start big. I learned to start with a nice big heavy hoop. I also watched many a hooper and noticed the ones keeping it up were barely moving, just effortless in the circle round. I was thinking about not thinking as I could feel my body find its own rhythm and groove. On a fabulous tip and from watching my girl, I started by just rockin it slowly back and forth. Pretty soon, there i was ever so subtly finding my own groove, rockin it there with my girl.
Then I thought some more about not thinking so hard about how helpful it can be to just let go sometimes and see what happens with that.
So this blog I suppose begins a journey of some exploration. There are some big dreams I am working on and this for me is just a place to write a little bit about daily life and the pursuit of some of these dreams.
Today has been one of those hugely emotional days celebrating the marriage of an old friend and saying goodbye again to one of my very best friends and her children as they head back to their home far away from the Northwest. So for now this is my start.
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